The Chicago Bears suck. Especially on defense.

Monday, November 10th, 2014

How f*cking terrible is the Chicago Bears defense? Historically f*cking terrible. And I'm talking the type of history that's so old it predates the birth of the useless slab of flabby meat formerly known as Lance Briggs, who rode a goddamn brontosaurus to school and now eats a whole one ...

Video: Every INT Jay Cutler has thrown against the Packers

Friday, November 7th, 2014

It's no secret that Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler is terrible against the Green Bay Packers. But I didn't know just how terrible until I looked into the stats and saw the video featured at the bottom of this post. In his 10 games against Green Bay, Cutler has a record ...

Chicago Bears teach a valuable gambling lesson

Tuesday, September 16th, 2014

"Never bet against your own team" is one of those adages you always hear, somewhere along the lines of "Never play in traffic," "never stick a knife down your toaster" and "never get involved in a land war in Asia." And yet...I just couldn't help myself. In my lifetime of watching the ...

Chicago Bears: Jay Cutler says ankle injury is serious

Monday, November 18th, 2013

Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler didn't play this week against the Baltimore Ravens as he sat out with a high ankle sprain in his left leg. On Monday he claimed the injury is more serious than originally reported, and head coach Marc Testman ruled him out for Sunday's matchup with ...

KO To Return To Bears?

Wednesday, November 23rd, 2011

Like they always say, never look a gift neckbeard in the mouth. Quarterback Kyle Orton became available this week when the Denver Broncos pledged to full-fledged Tebowmania for the remainder of 2011 and waived Orton. The timing is perfect for the Bears, who have possibly lost starter Jay Cutler for the remainder ...

NFL Week 2: Observations and Such

Tuesday, September 20th, 2011

Lots of things happened in the NFL this weekend. Here are my quick thoughts on the ones I paid attention to. - Mike Martz is a GD, MF-ing idiot. After Matt Forte gashed through the Saints defense on the Bears' second possession of the game, Martz decided it would be a ...

Polacks, Toilet Paper And The Chicago Bears Offensive Line

Wednesday, August 17th, 2011

The Chicago Bears allowed a league-high 56 sacks a season ago. Their franchise quarterback was chased from the NFC Championship Game because of the subsequent lack of protection. So you'd think the team would invest in improving the worst offensive line in the NFL. You'd think. There were plenty of good offensive ...

Todd Collins: NFL Quarterback?

Tuesday, January 25th, 2011

The Internet was on fire the past two days with everyone's take on whether or not Jay Cutler pussed out on Sunday. Whatever. I'm over it. His teammates are rather adamant that he didn't bail on them, and this story is already played out. The thing that blows my mind, and ...