Woe Is Miami

Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011

Patrick Dorsey, presumably no relation to Ken, penned an excellent ESPN Page 2 column on Monday which detailed the sheer hell that comes with being a Miami sports fan. But Patrick didn't quite go far enough when he said that Miami is on its way to becoming America's Most Miserable Sports ...

Cleveland’s Tide Turning? Ehh…

Thursday, May 19th, 2011

Based on the happenings of the past few weeks, it would appear that woebegone Cleveland is starting to experience something typically associated with fictional former Indians closer Rick Vaughn... winning. First, Peyton Hillis shocked the world by becoming the most average football player since, well, John Madden to be named to ...

Whatchu Talkin Bout…Hillis?

Tuesday, April 19th, 2011

The battle for Madden '12 cover boy (Motto: The only place you'll see the NFL in 2011-12!) has been narrowed down to Eagles quarterback Michael Vick and Cleveland Browns running back Jim Brown. Wait, what's that? (Looks at screen again) Browns running back PEYTON HILLIS? What the... On the surface, this appears to ...

Cleveland Finally Gets One To Go Its Way

Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

It's been a long time coming for the city of Cleveland. After years, hell, decades of repeated setbacks, the city finally got the big win it has been waiting for. Last night the Cavaliers ripped the visiting Miami Heat and LeBron James 102-90 in what had to be the most ...

Tale of the Tape: Cleveland Cavs vs. Cleveland Spiders

Friday, February 11th, 2011

Good news, Cleveland fans! This year's Cavaliers aren't even the worst team in your city's glorious history. Or are they? The distinction of worst team in the history of Cleveland -- if not all of sports -- has long been the domain of the 1899 Cleveland Spiders, who finished a putrid 20-134 ...

Things Are Getting Weird In Cleveland

Thursday, December 23rd, 2010

Even in the offseason, the Cleveland Indians are still drawing crowds to Jacobs Progressive Field, home of the least-attended baseball squadron in the league. How, you ask? Apparently, the organization has built something of a winter wonderland on the field in hopes that they'll pull in some offseason revenue. Lord knows ...

Buffalo Refuses To Surrender

Monday, November 29th, 2010

For as long as I have written for this site, I have speculated about the never-ending battle taking place on opposite ends of Lake Erie as Buffalo and Cleveland duke it out for the distinction of being America's Most Tortured Sports City. (I also commend Seattle's strong push to become ...