Brandon Weeden’s worst day ever

Monday, September 10th, 2012

Somewhere in the 92-year history of the National Football League, someone probably had a worse debut at quarterback than Brandon Weeden of the Cleveland Browns. However, finding such a performance would take a heck of a lot of research, and any time you're in the conversation for something that requires ...

Cleveland Browns Sell For Over $1 Billion

Friday, August 3rd, 2012

It makes sense that Jimmy Haslam is the new owner of the Cleveland Browns. Haslam made his fortune in truck stops, so he's already accustomed to everyone crapping all over his product. The price Haslam paid for the Browns was a little more eye-opening. According to ESPN, Haslam is plunking down more ...

Let’s Blow, Buffalo

Monday, November 21st, 2011

As Chris Berman always says, no one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills. Unfortunately, the Bills appear to be perpetually traveling as members of the Donner Party. A once-promising season is swirling down the toilet after the Bills lost their third-straight game on Sunday, this one a 35-8 blowout at the ...

Woe Is Miami

Tuesday, August 23rd, 2011

Patrick Dorsey, presumably no relation to Ken, penned an excellent ESPN Page 2 column on Monday which detailed the sheer hell that comes with being a Miami sports fan. But Patrick didn't quite go far enough when he said that Miami is on its way to becoming America's Most Miserable Sports ...

Cleveland’s Tide Turning? Ehh…

Thursday, May 19th, 2011

Based on the happenings of the past few weeks, it would appear that woebegone Cleveland is starting to experience something typically associated with fictional former Indians closer Rick Vaughn... winning. First, Peyton Hillis shocked the world by becoming the most average football player since, well, John Madden to be named to ...

Whatchu Talkin Bout…Hillis?

Tuesday, April 19th, 2011

The battle for Madden '12 cover boy (Motto: The only place you'll see the NFL in 2011-12!) has been narrowed down to Eagles quarterback Michael Vick and Cleveland Browns running back Jim Brown. Wait, what's that? (Looks at screen again) Browns running back PEYTON HILLIS? What the... On the surface, this appears to ...

Cleveland Finally Gets One To Go Its Way

Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

It's been a long time coming for the city of Cleveland. After years, hell, decades of repeated setbacks, the city finally got the big win it has been waiting for. Last night the Cavaliers ripped the visiting Miami Heat and LeBron James 102-90 in what had to be the most ...

Tale of the Tape: Cleveland Cavs vs. Cleveland Spiders

Friday, February 11th, 2011

Good news, Cleveland fans! This year's Cavaliers aren't even the worst team in your city's glorious history. Or are they? The distinction of worst team in the history of Cleveland -- if not all of sports -- has long been the domain of the 1899 Cleveland Spiders, who finished a putrid 20-134 ...