Archive for the ‘Golf’ Category

Hurricane Just What Dustin Johnson Ordered

Sunday, August 28th, 2011

Scientists have finally found a cure for Dustin Johnson choking in the final round of golf tournaments: hurricanes! (The kind that blows off the ocean, not the kind you drink before getting behind the wheel of a car... er, too soon?) Despite falling short of its predicted end to one-quarter of ...

A Message To Tiger, Take 2

Monday, August 8th, 2011

Tiger, Apparently my request to become your new full-time caddie was lost somewhere in the internet ether. Understandable. It happens, being a super-popular guy such as yourself. But after what happened this weekend, I just wanted to let you know that I'm still ready to pick up your bag if you need ...

Who’s Your Caddie? Me.

Thursday, July 21st, 2011

Dear Tiger, I see that you parted ways with caddie Steve Williams after 12 years, and unless you plan on becoming the only player on the PGA Tour to lug his own clubs around you're going to need someone on the bag. Look no further. I have over 7 years of excellent looping ...

Who Can Weather Brutal Conditions at the British Open?

Wednesday, July 13th, 2011

With the British Open set to begin Thursday at Royal St. George's in the wonderfully named Sandwich, England, it's time to acknowledge that what we're about to watch is going to be painfully entertaining. You know how it is when scores soar at the U.S. Open (that didn't happen last year, ...

Rory McIlroy As Skilled Off The Course As On

Monday, June 20th, 2011

What caught my eye about Rory McIlroy on Sunday was not how he dissected Congressional and the field for an eight-stroke win in a 16-under par demolition at the U.S. Open. It was a moment that happened shortly after the tournament was over. One that you could only see on TV ...

Wait, This Guy’s A Douche?

Thursday, May 5th, 2011

In news that is likely to shock the senses, the man pictured above is a total a-hole. Golfer Rory Sabbatini is allegedly getting suspended by the PGA Tour after two separate incidents of douchery at Tour events, but we can only say allegedly because the Tour keeps all disciplinary matters private. ...

Hideki Matsuyama To Join Japan Relief Effort

Sunday, April 10th, 2011

The top amateur at the Masters this weekend was Japan's Hideki Matsuyama. The 19-year-old Matsuyama is a student at Tohoku Fukushi University, which happens to be in Sendai, the area hardest hit by the devastating March 11 earthquake and tsunami. Now that his work at the Masters is over, Matsuyama plans ...

The World Learns What We Already Knew

Tuesday, October 5th, 2010

Celebrity has a way of dehumanizing people, which is part of the reason I have always thought it would be cool to know someone before they became famous. The old "Yeah, I remember when that guy was a regular schmoe just like me." (I've also thought it would be cool ...