Petrino For Payton Straight Up: Let’s Do It!

April 11, 2012 – 12:49 am by Hickey

So, the Arkansas Razorbacks suddenly need a coach next season. And so do the New Orleans Saints.

Let’s play Coach Swap!

This fall Sean Payton and Bobby Petrino are currently scheduled to have nothing to do. So for one season only, why not solve their problems with temporary coaching gigs? It was an idea first proposed to me by my Cousin Charlie, and the more I think about it, the more I love it.

For Arkansas, temp Sean Payton is a perfect choice. The Razorbacks aren’t going to find their right permanent fit this late in the game — any coach who abandons his current team in the middle of spring practice is a sleaze that’s likely to screw you over in the long term. Like, say, Bobby Petrino.

No one disputes that this year’s Razorbacks are loaded with talent. And if you can succeed tactically in the NFL, you can certainly do so in college. (Charlie Weis never happened, people! I swear!) Payton could keep the Hogs in contention for the SEC title, then hand over the reins to the long-term solution for the job when he heads back to the Saints after the season.

As for Petrino, what a perfect fit. He’s already coached in the division. And Saints fans don’t care who you’re nailing — in the bedroom or on the field after the whistle — so long as you’re winning.

Wait… you say he’s an insufferable douche who only went 3-10 before bailing out on the Falcons? Hmm.

Well, Sean Payton would still look good in Fayetteville.

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  1. 2 Responses to “Petrino For Payton Straight Up: Let’s Do It!”

  2. There isn’t much difference between the jobs really. Both are trying to please hardcore redneck fanbases.

    By Cousin Charlie on Apr 11, 2012

  3. Charlie who now? Oh, that blustery coach of Kansas! Right! Him. *shifty-eyed*

    Naming Petrino the coach of the Saints would probably make one of the ESPN radio jocks go apoplectic and perhaps cause immediate head explosion. My money is on Greenberg popping a vein over something like this. In other words: MAKE IT SO!

    By MJenks on Apr 11, 2012

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