The Jacksonville Jaguars have finally hired a head coach, selecting Atlanta Falcons offensive coordinator Mike Mularkey in an attempt to improve the NFL’s worst offense. The Jaguars plan to formally introduce Mularkey at a press conference on Wednesday.
Now I would make a joke about how this is a “bunch of Mularkey,” you know, playing off the fact that the word “malarkey” is slang for bullsh*t, but really the Jaguars don’t need me beating up on them right now. The 50-year-old Mularkey was hired a few days after his Falcons scored just two points in a 24-2 loss to the New York Giants, and the offense produced a grand total of zero of those.
So he’s a lock to improve Jacksonville’s offense, yeah?
Mularkey was previously the head coach of the Buffalo Bills from 2004 to 2005, and posted a less-than-stellar 14-18 record before being fired. He has been Atlanta’s offensive coordinator since 2008 and is credited with helping mentor young quarterback Matt Ryan…into a guy who couldn’t win a playoff game to save his life.
Clearly the Jaguars are hoping Mularkey can work some of that same magic on young quarterback Blaine Gabbert who was nothing short of atrocious in his rookie year. Gabbert finished the 2011 season having completed 210 of 413 passes (50.8 percent) for 2,214 yards, with 12 touchdowns and 11 interceptions. He was sacked 40 times and his passer rating of 65.4 ranked dead last among the 34 quarterbacks who qualified.
So uh, congratulations on the job Mr. Mularkey…good luck with that whole Gabbert thing.
Here is the part of the post where we give you some kind of interesting fact about the new head coach, sometimes it’s funny, or shocking, or might even make you think a little. All we’ve got for you on Mularkey is that he played tight end in the NFL for nine seasons and his middle name is Rene.
Seriously, that’s it.
A guy who played tight end with the middle name Rene? I’m sure no one has ever jokes at his expense. Nope, never. Because, I mean, who would do such a thing?