Manny Beating Beaty?

September 14, 2011 – 12:12 am by Hickey

As we all know, there is nothing funny about domestic abuse — unless it is committed by Manny Ramirez! Because everything that guy does is hilarious!

OK, so not really.

Ramirez was released from a Fort Lauderdale jail on Tuesday after spending Monday night there following his arrest for allegedly slapping his wife. The judge ordered him to avoid contact with his wife, which as we understand is a pretty standard arrangement in most marriages anyway.

However, Ramirez did not do the image of his temper any favors immediately thereafter, grabbing two TV microphones that were sticking into his truck and tossing them out the window when reporters attempted to interview him following his release.

It will be interesting to see what defense Manny’s lawyers use should this go to trial. “Manny being Manny” has been the standardized defense for every other stupid thing he has done in his life, but I don’t think there has ever been a legal precedent set for it. (Someone in our legal department help me out on that one).

If I were Manny’s lawyer, I’d use the much more workable defense of “Your honor, it’s clear that Mr. Ramirez has proven himself incapable of hitting anything in the year 2011.”

Although I secretly wonder if he was upset at his wife because she still hasn’t been able to get him pregnant.

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