The steroids-tainted 2004 MLB Champion Boston Red Sox Reunion Tour is coming to a stadium near you this summer. Two of your favorite “Idiots,” Manny Ramirez and Johnny Damon are going to be Tampa Bay Rays in 2011. They’ll be playing all your favorite hits and bringing back all of Bill Simmons’ favorite tear-jerking and cheer-causing moments, mostly because every broadcast will feature at least one clip of them as Red Sox that year.
As with any reunion tour, there are inevitably missing members of the original lineup, everyone’s a little fatter, everyone’s foibles have been brutally exposed as a result of their fame, and everything is a hell of a lot lamer than it was the first time around.
This reunion tour features two integral parts of the 2004 Red Sox, though David Ortiz and Curt Schilling are two big missing pieces. Heck, Ortiz has been missing from Boston’s lineup since that year (Zing!).
The nearest musical equivalent I can think of is The Who touring with just Pete Townshend and Roger Daltrey. Everyone knows the two of them, but without Keith Moon (dead, much like Papi) and John Entwistle (also dead, though Curt Schilling just retired), it’s just not The Who.
Instead, it’s a couple of old guys playing something you recognize, but this time it’s mostly for the money and seeing if they can hang on just a little bit longer. I mean, what the hell else are Pete and Roger, er, Manny and Johnny going to do?
Regardless, be prepared for a hell of a lot of reminiscing and glossing over a few minor details (like, you know, steroids). Frankly, there aren’t a ton of interesting things happening in Major League Baseball this coming year. It’ll be fun to watch the Yankees fail, and to the National League fail to generate any kind of offense yet again. The Phillies will be pretty good I hear.
But the big coverage early in the season will be about the NFL labor issues, and late in the season, it’ll be the impending NBA lockout. Baseball might as well have a redux of an old fan favorite going for it, right?