Al Davis Is Always Good For A Laugh

January 19, 2011 – 2:11 am by Ryan Phillips

Oakland Raiders owner Al Davis, who is still alive thanks to nightly readings of the Necronomicon and the daily drinking of virgin blood (or so we hear), hired a new coach on Tuesday. Yes, Raiders offensive coordinator Hue Jackson was promoted to the big job, but more importantly, Davis used the opportunity to dump on his newly-ousted head coach. Again. Because that’s what he does.

Tom Cable took the Raiders to an 8-8 season this year when absolutely nothing was expected from them. The team clearly appeared to be on the right track. But according to Davis, Cable was a liar.

Wait, where have we heard this before? Oh, right, Davis called Lane Kiffin a liar during a now-legendary press conference.

He also alleged that former coach Mike Shanahan was dishonest and therefore didn’t deserve the remaining money on his contract. Shanahan was fired in 1989. To this day Davis still owes him $250,000. Oh, and he never paid Lane Kiffin the final $6 million on his contract either. As for Cable, Davis withheld $120,000 in $20,000 increments. Hell of a guy that Al Davis.

According to inside sources, Davis’ main point of contention with Kiffin was JaMarcus Russell. Kiffin didn’t think Russell had the stuff to be a top-level NFL quarterback and Davis was peeved that his young coach didn’t play his young quarterback. Davis thought Russell was destined to be a star. I wonder who history will say was right on that one?

With Cable, Davis apparently was angered that Cable brought visitors on road trips and also by two pending lawsuits filed against the Raiders because Cable (allegedly) physically abused his ex-girlfriend (Marie Lutz) and a former assistant (Randy Hanson). Davis claims that Cable’s actions were “against the Raider way.” Really? Frankly that sounds exactly like the Raider way.

The best part of this whole thing is, these coaches for Davis have gone out and done their best. But he looks at it like they’re failing to win consistently to humiliate him personally. Um, Al, your coaches don’t have to humiliate you, your drafting has done that already.

Seriously, other than having his organization win three Super Bowls in spite of him and being present when the Magna Carta was signed, what has Al Davis done right? He’s like Jerry Jones…only not charming in any way. And not funny to watch. In fact, when I look at him I get the sick feeling that he goes home and eats kittens for dinner. He’s like what would happen if Montgomery Burns and Dracula had a kid.

Anyway, good luck Hue Jackson. I’m sure this will end well.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

  1. 1 Trackback(s)

  2. Jan 19, 2011: World Spinner

Post a Comment