Kyle Parker Chose Football Mediocrity Over Baseball Mediocrity

July 22, 2010 – 7:10 pm by McD

Kyle Parker is one of those alpha-male stud athlete types that is easy to either love or hate, depending on one’s perspective. Easy with the gay jokes, I just thought it was a good opening line.

Actually, I kind of feel bad for Parker. It’s not often a guy can play high Division I football and baseball at the same time and still manage to be an NFL prospect and get drafted in the first round of the MLB draft by the Colorado Rockies. Pretty good freaking position to be in, but the inevitable choice for Parker has loomed over him and Clemson all summer.

Parker ended up choosing to not sign with the Colorado Rockies organization (and turn down first-round money) so he can play his senior season at Clemson this fall.

The reason I feel bad for him is his choice was between Clemson football and Rockies baseball. Well, not the majors. Something like the Single-A Tri-City Dust Devils, Asheville Tourists, or high-A Modesto Nuts. Maybe even the Double-A Tulsa Drillers. In any case, he’s choosing between a historically mediocre baseball organization and, well, Clemson football, which would probably hang Rockies-style “1995 wild card champions” flags in their football stadium given the opportunity.

Not exactly winning traditions on either side.

Plus, Clemson just lost C.J. Spiller and Jacoby Ford and, though Parker is the firmly entrenched starter, if anything goes wrong this season, the fans might be clamoring for the young but hugely talented Tajh Boyd. Maybe he just really wanted to play North Texas and Presbyterian this fall. Nice scheduling for Clemson, by the way.

Let’s break down his choice for the late summer and fall: playing minor league ball would mean road trips by bus all over random small towns and many, many baseball games that mean essentially nothing to anyone, the pressure to prove himself and his draft status, and the better-than-average chance that he can’t hack it in professional baseball anyway. Maybe, MAYBE he gets called up in a couple of years.

Playing for Clemson this fall means the following schedule: vs. North Texas, vs. Presbyterian, at Auburn, vs. Miami (FL), at North Carolina, vs. Maryland, vs. Georgia Tech, at Boston College, vs. NC State, at Florida State, at Wake Forest, vs. South Carolina.

Conservatively guessed, that’s a 6-6 or 7-5 schedule waiting to happen. They only have to get by FSU and BC in order to win their division and make the ACC title game, but it’s not like they’re a national title team. Plus, this is Clemson we’re talking about. They average at least two catastrophic losses every season, so 6-6 is probably where they’re headed.

In the minds of Clemson fans, Parker is supposed to change all that. He is the lone remaining star on the team and probably its leader too. And there is the main reason that probably explains his decision.

The one thing you have to give Parker credit for is turning down what would surely be a life-changing amount of money for one more shot at glory on the gridiron. Not too many guys would do that given the dangers of playing football. One wrong step or missed blocking assignment and his career in both sports could be over.

Parker doesn’t owe anything to the Rockies (yet). He hasn’t bled with them and lost to Maryland for two consecutive years with them. There’s no history.  So Kyle Parker, I salute you and your brazenness. I just don’t expect to ever hear from you again. Until the Padres are kicking your ass four years from now. BAM.

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  1. 30 Responses to “Kyle Parker Chose Football Mediocrity Over Baseball Mediocrity”

  2. I doubt that it will affect your analysis but Parker was a true freshman last season. So unless he has been taking well over 30 hours a semester he will not be going into his senior season. Just saying…

    By whitaker on Jul 24, 2010

  3. He will be a red-shirt sophomore this year. Do some research, Coot! Talk about mediocrity. What is South Carolina’s all-time record in football? You guys are just a tad bit under mediocrity. Bam.

    By Williams on Jul 27, 2010

  4. Williams,

    its your mother. Im getting drilled tonight by the landlord to pay our rent. Please make your own dinner.

    Love mom

    By Your mom on Jul 27, 2010

  5. As noted in one of the comments above, Parker will be a redshirt sophmore in football this year. Nice research, “sportswriters”. Of course, if anyone would be familar with mediocre football, it would be guys like you who went to a loser school like Indiana.

    By Beano Cook on Jul 27, 2010

  6. Williams,

    its your father. Im getting drilled tonight by the landlord just because. Please make your own dinner.

    Love dad

    By Your dad on Jul 27, 2010

  7. Assbag McD, stop writing crappy articles that have no truth based to them and are full of incorrectness and get back on the fries, its almost time for the lunch crowd…

    By The boss on Jul 27, 2010

  8. Hey dad,

    I’m having fun at camp. The other boys taught me how to pull a train today.

    Your son

    By Your son on Jul 27, 2010

  9. How can you discount New Orleans Voodoo as an influencing factor in his decision? You’re jumping to conclusions without any knowledge of dark powers that you don’t understand.

    By Devereaux Boudreaux on Jul 27, 2010

  10. Wow! This is some funny stuff coming from some Indiana guys. Talk about mediocrity. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

    By XM on Jul 27, 2010

  11. ARK!

    By TechnoViking on Jul 27, 2010

  12. Moron, that is all.

    By Who Cares on Jul 27, 2010

  13. As a gamecock fan who posts on a clemson message board (which is by no means a metaphor for my own gender identity problems), I take serious offense with this post.

    By BravoScok on Jul 27, 2010

  14. I told you to eat more celery, you drip like a leaky faucet…a small leaky faucet.

    By Peter North on Jul 27, 2010

  15. I like your new Angus burgers.

    By McG on Jul 27, 2010

  16. McD,

    How many times have I told not to smoke and blog you dumbass!


    By DAD on Jul 27, 2010

  17. Unbelievable. You are the most uninformed coot lover I have ever had the pleasure to read something by. So Kyle Parker is the only remaining “star”? Ever heard of Deandre McDaniel? JW. And Clemson is going to go 6-6? Well if that is so, we must be going into the final game of the regular schedule as 5-6 (since our last game will be a cake walk) and I just don’t see that being the case.

    By JT Money on Jul 27, 2010

  18. This is the worst excuse for an “article” or “blog” that I have ever read. You feel bad for Kyle Parker? Someone who just turned down a 2.4 MILLION dollar signing bonus, because he can?

    You are an idiot. Please stop putting your rambling thoughts on paper

    By Jay on Jul 27, 2010

  19. Yeah, I heard of Andre McDaniel. He beat me up and threw me down the stairs. Clemson had to pay me to drop the charges so Andre could play. Of course the coaches didn’t care. Clemson lost their experienced corners, so Andre is going to get burned this fall, he better put on an asbestos jockstrap.

    “Don’t send Flowers to your Mother”

    By McDaniel's Battered Girlfriend on Jul 28, 2010

  20. Kyle has till August 16 to sign with the Rockies. He hasn’t picked up a football since last season. Of course none of this is a distraction to the Clemson team, that lost Spiller, Ford and Palmer, its whole offense last season. When Kyle is in two a days and getting live contact, he will think of the Rockies.

    By Kyle's Father, his agent on Jul 28, 2010

  21. I am scared we will have a losing season. At least I have insurance sales experience to fall back on. My offensive coordinator’s last job was delivering papers.

    By Daboo Sweeney on Jul 28, 2010

  22. We are the Mean Green of North Texas State. Nobody offered us a baseball contract. We will hit you until the whistle stops blowing, so be forewarned.

    By Mean Green on Jul 28, 2010

  23. McD

    This analysis is precisely what we will feature, if we ever talk about Clempson on ESPN. Even though you can’t spell “Clempson” without ESPN, we rarely talk about the ACC and the other non-BCS leagues on our show.

    By ESPN on Jul 28, 2010

  24. I love you, you love me,

    But can you do something about those freaking butt ugly cornflower-colored uniforms? That is truly embarassing looking. The pimps and crack addicts have complained that it makes them look dignified, and we can’t have that.

    By Barney on Jul 28, 2010

  25. I wish I knew how to quit you.

    By Willy Korn on Jul 28, 2010

  26. I for one think Kyle needed another year back. He had a terrible time hitting CWS pitching. Now he comes back from some football, I bet he tears up the Cocks this year.

    I know he has no CJ or Ford but I think Clemson has a special season and Kyle takes us there.


    Going to Macs

    By Dildo Sweaty on Jul 28, 2010

  27. I will beat you effin silly, literally, just ask the ex-BOT’s grandson.

    By Jamie Cumbie on Jul 29, 2010

  28. Can I still keep this lake house and can my baby daddy still keep his fly set of wheels??

    By C.J.'s baby mama on Jul 29, 2010

  29. Glad to see Kyle received my check.

    By Danny Ford on Jul 29, 2010

  30. I can’t wait to see Kyle in his Rockies’ uniform.

    Hey Daboo, need any help this season with the team? I’m free all Fall.

    By Tommy Bowden on Jul 29, 2010

  31. We done smoked it.

    By Duane Coleman on Jul 29, 2010

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