Archive for March, 2010

School With Funky Name Ready To Reach The Summit

Tuesday, March 9th, 2010

We’ve hammered home the realization that my alma mater Indiana University is not going to make the NCAA Tournament this month. That is unless the Hoosiers miraculously win the Big Ten Tournament. But I’m not holding my breath. Stevie Wonder has a better chance making it out of a maze. But ...

At Least Reggie Miller’s ESPN Mini-Movie Is Coming Soon

Tuesday, March 9th, 2010

For the fourth consecutive season, the Indiana Pacers are guaranteed a losing record. But despite their recent failings, the Pacers annually manage to win meaningless games late in the season, assuring themselves of a low-end lottery pick. It drives Pacers fans mad. I should know, I live in Indy. In fact, Indiana ...

A New World Record For Lame

Monday, March 8th, 2010

I used to think that we reached our peak of embarrassment as a species back when Yankees fans established a world record for the most people simultaneously doing the Macarena. (It's hard to believe that no one has been able to get more than 50,000 people to dance to Los ...

Allen Iverson Is Doing Just Great

Monday, March 8th, 2010

Stephen A. Smith, star of the smash hit "Quite Frankly with Stephen A. Smith," reports today that Allen Iverson has major issues of the non-basketball variety. Smith's column from today's Philadelphia Inquirer claims that Iverson has major drinking and gambling issues that have derailed his career and threaten to ruin ...

Indiana University: Where Ten Wins Make Us Smile

Monday, March 8th, 2010

As you loyal Rumors and Rants readers are all too familiar with by now, we’re a bunch of Indiana University graduates. Which means a few things: 1. We apparently weren’t smart enough to get into our No. 1 college choice (Northwestern in my case). 2. We watch “Breaking Away” at least ...

Chicago Makes Sure It’s A Bear Market

Friday, March 5th, 2010

For the Chicago Bears, the NFL Draft started midnight EST Thursday. Yesterday, I called my friends who are Bears fans - like myself - to remind them of that fact. Without a first or second round pick because of the Jay Cutler and Gaines Adams (RIP) trades, the Bears really only ...

From My Cold Dead Hands

Friday, March 5th, 2010

Since Gilbert Arenas and Javaris Crittenton’s OK Corral showdown in the Wizards’ locker room in December, professional sports leagues are trying to deal with handguns in the workplace. Major League Baseball recently posted signs in every clubhouse reading, “individuals are prohibited from possessing deadly weapons while performing any services for MLB.” ...

U.S. Soccer: Red, White, Black And Blue

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

Alright U.S. Soccer, do us all a favor. Cancel the remaining friendlies leading up to the World Cup. Pull the entire roster from club play, send them to a beach resort where lovely women will massage them daily. Provide them with hyperbaric chambers to sleep in. We’re less than 100 days ...

Julius Peppers And Daniel Snyder: A Match Made Somewhere Expensive

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

Carolina Panthers defensive end Julius Peppers is finally getting his wish to test the open market and find a new home. The five-time Pro Bowler will likely be somewhere other than Carolina next season, taking his 81 career sacks (in eight seasons) to a new team. And there's a guy ...

The Draft Keiland Williams Campaign Starts Today

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

In the coming weeks, much will be made of what the San Diego Chargers are going to do at the running back position. In fact, ESPN is already doing just that. There are a ton of options for the Bolts, though now that I've read the above article, ...