The Face Of Our Curling Woes

February 19, 2010 – 1:52 am by Hickey

As you were alerted to yesterday, the United States has gotten off to an alarmingly terrible start in the 2010 Olympics in the only sport that matters: curling.

Things only got worse on Thursday, as both the men’s and women’s teams were defeated once again by identical 7-6 scores against the filthy Danes.

Men’s skip John Shuster, who helped the Americans to the bronze in 2006, has turned all choke artist on us by missing potential game-winning shots in all four matches.

Then again we shouldn’t be surprisedĀ  considering who the U.S. picked as its honorary captain: 49ers tight end Vernon Davis. Yeah, Davis finally had a breakthrough year this season, but prior to that he was only known for being the guy for whom the phrase “popcorn muscles” was invented.

Most importantly, he was the inspiration for the following legendary rant by Mike Singletary:

I want winners, U.S. Curling. Get Vernon Davis outta here!

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  1. 5 Responses to “The Face Of Our Curling Woes”

  2. Maybe the Curling team needs Mike Singletary to be coach for 2014…

    By MJenks on Feb 19, 2010

  3. I don’t know if you’re being facetious with these curling posts, but lets face it, the US isn’t any good at the Winter Olympics short of ‘US events’ like figure skating and downhill events.

    Oh, and also the ‘x-treme’ events that were shoehorned into The Games for some reason.

    It’s just a collection of games Americans either don’t understand or simply don’t care about because there aren’t point spreads cheerleaders…

    It’s only about now that I lament not being able to watch it on TV. But then, I’m on the West Coast… I can’t watch it anyway.

    By Santa Claustrophobia on Feb 19, 2010

  4. I WANT WINNERS!!!

    By roundthewaygirl on Feb 23, 2010

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  2. Feb 20, 2010: Vernon Davis Inspiring Curlers « Doin Work
  3. Feb 20, 2010: Vernon Davis Inspiring Curlers « Doin Work

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