Score One For Abstinence

July 13, 2009 – 1:33 am by Hickey

Abstinence education always gets knocked around because — well, let’s face it, you might as well tell stoners not to eat Doritos. But it’s my opinion that the abstinence ed people have been using the wrong tactics, and we’d like to bolster their cause.

As you know, last week Steve McNair was tragically murdered by a clearly mentally unstable girlfriend. Now, this past weekend, it seems that former boxing champ Arturo Gatti may have been murdered by his wife — or at least that’s what police are thinking at this point.

The lesson?

Don’t have sex. Especially with chicks in their 20s. Those bitches are insane and will kill you.

And if you don’t believe abstinence works, ask The Baker. He’s doing just fine.

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  1. 4 Responses to “Score One For Abstinence”

  2. Abstinence or castration. Either way.

    By Phillips on Jul 13, 2009

  3. It’s no surprise that is the first article with an “Abstinence” tag on this site.

    By Cousin Charlie on Jul 13, 2009

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