To Watch Tonight…You Should Probably Go See a Movie

MLB, New York at Boston (ESPN, 7 p.m.): It’s pretty funny that New York can’t seem to beat Boston these days. But this whole rivalry is overblown and both teams are equally unbearable. There is a reason to watch though. Chien-Ming Wang is taking the mound tonight with his 14.46 ERA. If he gets it together the Yankees have a formidable rotation. Then again, if they can’t beat the Red Sox it won’t matter come October.

MLS, Chivas USA at Houston (ESPN2, 8:30 p.m.): I honestly don’t even know how to pitch this. Nobody cares about the MLS, do they? I didn’t even know they televised these games live. I figured it came on tape delay or something.

Monsterquest, The Curse of the Monkey Man (History Channel, 9 p.m.): Is it possible for a new episode of Monsterquest to have a better title than this? I think not. Apparently some kind of monkey creature was terrorizing people in New Dehli in 2001. That sounds…awesome.

In the Line of Fire (AMC, 11 p.m.): John Malkovich plays a would-be presidential assassin on the loose and Clint Eastwood plays the Secret Service agent that has to protect the president. Pretty good flick out of the early 90s. And let’s face it, there isn’t anytihng else on tonight. Oh, and Rene Russo is in this movie. I almost forgot.