Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

During a night out in Chicago this weekend, I took a look around the table at some of my friends from college. We’re four years removed from our days of nightly debauchery and are in our mid-to-late 20s. That means a number of things: engagements, births, layoffs and perhaps most depressing, receding hair lines.

The latter is causing me the most anguish.

I’m not bald – yet.

Like most men my age, I’m fretting about losing my hair though. Now, I’m not anywhere near as far gone as some of my buddies. One of my old roommates has been on Propecia since the 8th grade. I have a slight receding hair line. I repeat, slight.

But that doesn’t mean I’m not scared to death of losing my gorgeous locks. I was rocking The Blagoevich-look way before he was selling Senate seats.

But apparently bald is in. Just take a look at this photo from Monday night’s UConn-Louisville broadcast on ESPN. Take a second to count the number of bald dudes in this shot.

I counted at least nine. What did you come up with?

I’m not 100% sure what I’d do if I went bald. My dome isn’t suited for the sexy, rugged hairless look of Bruce Willis. If my bulbous head goes barren up top, I’m thinking I’d look more like Larry David.

We’re talking Michael Chiklis, “The Commish” days, not Michael Chiklis, bald bad ass in “The Shield.”

Perhaps, I’d do what one of my favorite college basketball referees did.

Now, I’m not one for blowing up one’s spot, but my boy Eddie Hightower has done a pretty damn good job of disguising his exposed cranium. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Ed Hightower, he’s a Big Ten legend and has worked 12 Final Fours. He likes to embellish some of his foul calls and at times he baits a player or two into a technical foul (ala Penn State’s Jamelle Cornley on Sunday), but hey he’s Eddie H.

I’ve been watching Big Ten basketball for years and Hightower is an omnipresent force. So imagine my shock when I was watching ESPN Classic a year ago of an old Purdue-Indiana game and ours truly was working the game with a markedly different look.

Eddie H. was bald! Or balding severely if you want to split hairs. I’ve been sitting on this little secret for a while. It’s nearly impossible to find pictures of a bald Ed Hightower. There are pictures of him refereeing a mud wrestling match, dancing in a disco, dancing in a late 80s music video, laying down more cowbell, assisting in the French Revolution, thinking that John Denver was full of shit and flying a Star Wars landspeeder in “Return of the Jedi.” But no pictures of him before he went Bosley on us.

So I had to bide my time, and the Big Ten Network came through. Finally, after weeks of scanning ESPN Classic and BTN programming I came across the Big Ten’s Greatest Seasons: 1989. Jackpot! Now, all I needed was a clear shot of Hightower. It took 35 minutes but there it was. A sight for sore eyes.

Sorry Ed. Remember, I’m a Hoosier Purdue fan. So if you call Tuesday’s Purdue-Ohio State game, just keep that in mind.