A couple of weeks ago we told you that Kelvin Sampson cursed the Milwaukee Bucks with his mere presence. Maybe you were a skeptic and didn’t believe us. You think curses are kid stuff for silly people.
But Bango believes.
Who is Bango?
He’s only been the Bucks’ mascot since 1977. And for the first time in his career, he was put on the injured list after suffering a freak injury during last weekend’s all-star festivities. Chances are you’ve already seen the footage of Bango standing on the hoop listening to the Axel Foley Theme, getting hit in the balls by a basketball and then falling through the hoop and tearing his ACL.
This, of course, came on top of major injuries to fellow Bucks Michael Redd, Andrew Bogut and Luke Ridnour — just the dudes who lead the team in scoring, rebounding and assisting, respectively.
We’re just telling you why it happened. And that reason is Ole Assholeface himself. Our own Cousin Charlie was proud to report that Bango was back in uniform when the Bucks faced the Cavs on Friday night, although his motion was limited by a giant mascot-sized knee brace — a knee brace that would never have to be there if Assholeface never came to Milwaukee.