Michael Phelps Makes Me Feel Terrible

August 13, 2008 – 12:02 am by TheRiot


Yep, just terrible.

I’m not going to get into the specifics or anything, but he’s giving me a complex. So far the only thing I’ve really accomplished in life is being college educated. Yep, got the ‘ol diploma from a fine public institution.

Michael Phelps, on the other hand, is just about the same age and is arguably the greatest Olympic athlete of all time after collecting two more gold medals early today (China time). He’s on his way to the most dominating Olympic performance ever.

He’ll never have to work a day in his life.

Oh, and let’s not forget he’s the object of female sexual tension everywhere because he is shirtless at all times. What a (lucky) bastard.

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  1. One Response to “Michael Phelps Makes Me Feel Terrible”

  2. If you were Michael Phelps, would you bang chicks while you were wearing all of your gold medals? I bet Mark Spitz did. And I know I would.

    By Hick Flick on Aug 13, 2008

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