To John Paxson: A Memorandum

April 30, 2008 – 4:07 pm by TheRiot

Johnny P-

Please, please do not fuck this up. That’s all I’m asking. Don’t screw it up. You and I both know the Bulls as currently constituted aren’t nearly as bad as they played this year. They gave up on Scott Skiles and Jim Boylan didn’t stand a chance.

But sweet Lord, this year was horrible. We cannot have that again. Or you’ll probably get fired. My advice? When you hire another coach you’d better hit a home run.

Luckily, you’re going to get a chance. A coach with NBA Finals experience got fired today. His name is Avery Johnson. You might have heard of him. I bet a defensive-minded coach with deep playoff experience could do wonders for this young Bulls team.

Then again, he’s kind of like Scott Skiles. Except better and maybe a shade less abrasive. There’s option No. 1.

Option No. 2: Mike D’Antoni. Looks like he’s on his way out of Phoenix. Maybe. Hard to say. ESPN hasn’t told me yet.

But if there’s anyone that can fashion a winner out of this team it’s D’Antoni. I mean, other than my boy Aaron Gray, this roster could easily get up and down the floor and take to D’Antoni’s system.

Envision: Kirk Hinrich and Tyrus Thomas (or Joakim Noah) running the pick and roll while Ben Gordon, Luol Deng and Larry Hughes wait on the perimeter to bust shots. The style itself would create huge matchup problems in the East.

Those are two pretty good options, wouldn’t you say, John?

I’ll leave you with this: This will be your last coaching hire. After last season, you will not be around to hire another coach if this one flops. Pick a sure winner. With either one of these guys the Bulls are back in the playoffs next year.

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  1. 4 Responses to “To John Paxson: A Memorandum”

  2. Envision: Kirk Hinrich and Tyrus Thomas (or Joakim Noah) running the pick and roll while Ben Gordon, Luol Deng and Larry Hughes wait on the perimeter to bust shots

    I just got nauseas. Also, Gordon is gone after this year. He and Hughes cant coexist.

    By Anonymous on May 1, 2008

  3. Larry Hughes, busting shots?

    Really?

    I mean…..

    REALLY? Isn’t that the worst part of his game?

    By Anonymous on May 1, 2008

  4. “like Skiles only better”????

    Did you actually mean “like Skiles only shorter.”? or “like Skiles only with a sillier voice.”?

    If you are happy with 55 wins in the regular season and nada in the playoffs, go get the little general by all means.

    This whle idea of changing coaches because the players have “tuned him out” is so ludicrous. Try tuning out your boss at work and see who gets fired.

    By Anonymous on May 1, 2008

  5. Why not Rick Carlisle? He still might be capable of more than he’s accomplished in Detroit and Indiana. Remember, any chance of Carlisle winning a title in Indiana disappeared when that cup of beer hit Ron Artest in the chest.

    By Scott on May 1, 2008

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