General Speculation

February 22, 2008 – 1:39 am by Hickey

Last week, I was complaining about how there was nothing interesting going on in the world of sports. My, how quickly things change. Now I have too many things to stuff into one post. But we’ll start with the most important item.

Bob Knight will never coach at Indiana again. Ever.
Almost immediately after we heard that the door was said to be slamming on Kelvin Sampson’s ass, the rumor mill clamoring for the General’s return was in full effect. It started as one of those fun ponderables moreso than anything serious, like when you list the five celebrities that you could cheat on your significant other with. You know it’ll never happen, but you still create the list.

Only some people are taking this Knight talk seriously. Saying that he left Texas Tech when he did because he knew something big was about to go down at IU. And there’s a multitude of groups on Facebook calling for his return.

But here’s the thing that people are forgetting: if there’s one thing that Bob Knight has never done well, it’s forgive a grudge. When guys transferred out of the program, like Neil Reed and Luke Recker, you could count on a campaign to smear their character leaking from Assembly Hall. Even if they really were d-bags who didn’t want to work hard — and I’m not saying that they were or were not — you didn’t hear about it until they were leaving the program.

So now you’d be asking Knight to be willing to go back to the place that screwed him over harder than anyone ever did (at least from his eyes). Even though the administration responsible for his firing is no longer in place at IU, it’s impossible for me to comprehend a world in which he would decide it was acceptable to return to the old stomping, kicking and throwing grounds.

Bulls dump washed-up Ben Wallace

When the Bulls signed Ben Wallace before last season, it was thought that he would be the veteran presence needed to guide the “Baby Bulls” to the next level. And though he underachieved spectacularly during the regular season, he played well enough in the first round to help the Bulls spank the Heat. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough to get past his old team, the Pistons, but that was what this season was for.

So much for that idea. The Bulls have been a terrible team completely devoid of any sort of leadership, and that begins and ends with “Big” Ben, who has done nothing but collect a paycheck. Despite the largeness of that paycheck, Bulls GM John Paxson was still able to find a taker in the Cavs as part of a massive three-team, 11-player deal that included so much dead wood that I expected to see Vin Baker’s name somewhere on the list.

Despite the hard feelings towards Wallace, I do have one enduring memory that would not have been possible without him. Apparently a gong goes off over the United Center P.A. every time Big Ben blocks a shot (not very often). I was watching a recent game where this happened, prompting Bulls TV announcer Tom Dore to say “And there’s Johnny Red Kerr’s Big Ben Bong!”

Perhaps my cousin Donny and I are the only ones who found the thought of Johnny Red Kerr owning a bong shaped like Ben Wallace amusing. But in the long run, that’s what I’ll remember Wallace’s Bulls career by.

Candace Parker leaving school early
My dad and I had this conversation after we saw this item on TV.
Dad: What’s she leaving school early for?
Me: To play in the WNBA.
Dad: So… what’s she leaving school early for?
That about sums it up.

And finally…
An informed sports fan always makes sure to read his newspaper’s agate. Otherwise, you’ll miss items like this, which came across the wire on Wednesday.

ARKANSAS STATE — Announced the resignation of Dickey Nutt, men’s basketball coach.

Yes. There is a man named Dickey Nutt.

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  1. 2 Responses to “General Speculation”

  2. There has been a lot of “thank god we got rid of Wallace” talk today.

    I just wan’t to point out that cleveland fans feel the same way, just not about Wallace:

    http://heylarryhughespleasestoptakingsomanybadshots.com/

    By Paterno Lives! on Feb 22, 2008

  3. I find Red Kerr’s Ben Wallace Bong quite amusing too. I think John Paxon was hitting it too much when he decided at the deadline last year and offseason this year that “nah, we don’t need an impact player, we’re good.” Did you see the collection of spare parts the Lakers gave up for Gasol? Like the Bulls didn’t have that lying around for the past year???

    By Charlie on Feb 24, 2008

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