This Halloween, I was hoping to win a few costume competitions with my rendition of Magnum, P.I. Unfortunately, I fell short in those grandiose hopes, but a Detroit icon not named Tom Selleck did come up big-time with his costume selection.
We are of course referring to Lions quarterback Jon Kitna, who showed up to wide receiver Mike Furrey’s charity costume party “dressed” as defensive line coach Joe Cullen, who infamously drove through a Wendy’s drive-thru naked last year. (Hence the need to put quotation marks around the word dressed).
As it turns out, not too many people found Kitna’s get-up so amusing. Pretty much every columnist in the nation was appalled by his actions, particularly Detroit Free-Press scribe Drew Sharp. Sharp wrote, “What was Kitna thinking? Was such brazenness another example of the swashbuckling cowboy attitude that has made him the emotional and spiritual backbone of the Lions’ locker room?“
Actually, I’m pretty sure Kitna was thinking “This will be hilarious.” And it was. Cullen, who when he was an assistant at Indiana University was said to yell so hard at his players that he made himself puke, probably could use a little humor in his life. And the comedy is that much better when provided by Kitna, whose sense of humor provides a light-hearted counter to the intensity and strict bible-thumping that most of us associate with his personality.
So keep the pranks coming, Jon. I’m now officially rooting for you to get those 10 wins that you promised this off-season. Jesus loves you, and I do too.