Mexican politician Roberto Madrazo, the loser in last year’s Mexican Presidential race, has been stripped of his victory at the Berlin Marathon last month because he cheated massively and did so while using a major cliche. Talk about a double whammy. Madrazo won the 55-year-old category at the marathon with a time of 2:41:12, only 36 minutes above the word record. The most amazing part of his run was when he covered a 15 kilometer section of the course in only 21 minutes. That’s pretty incredible.
Actually, it’s impossible for a human to run that fast. The record for a 15 kilometer run is over 41 minutes. Madrazo obviously took a shortcut, but that’s only the beginning of his brazen cheating. His time at the San Diego marathon recently was more than an hour slower than in Berlin. He also won the Berlin marathon while wearing a windbreaker and long running pants in sixty-degree weather.
“It was so obvious to me: if you look at everyone else that’s in the picture, everyone’s wearing T-shirts and shorts, and the guy’s got a jacket on and a hat or whatever,” said New York-based marathon photographer Victor Sailer, who alerted race organizers to the possible fraud, “I looked at it and was like, wait a second.”
Look, this stuff might have worked on television, but that doesn’t mean it’ll work in real life. America, Germany, and the rest of the world much prefer our athletes to just use performance-enhancing drugs and get caught instead of using a gag that was on The Simpsons. Full Disclosure: It was actually Bart that cheated, but finding a picture of that was a pain in the ass, so you get Homer. We want our sports cheaters to get caught and admit it like Marion Jones just did. We’ll also accept existing under a cloud of obvious impropriety but continuing to play as if nothing happened a la Barry Bonds.
So the guy isn’t just a cheater, he thinks we’re all idiots too. But the worst part of all this is that he simply took a shortcut to win a marathon. The guy couldn’t find any other way to make himself look good? You’d think they’d have taught him to avoid cliches like that when he was at UCLA. It’s been done dude. Not that accidentally taking a Simpsons plot line is difficult. Those guys have done everything at this point.