Indiana University Football: It’s Slightly Improved

October 3, 2007 – 5:23 pm by McD

Sports have taken a bit of a downward turn in the last few months at Indiana University. First, the beloved football coach died and then a prized basketball recruit went into business for himself, as it were. Never fear, Indiana fan, the football team is here!

Is Wednesday too early to hype up a Saturday matchup? Maybe. Is October too early to start talking bowl berths? Definitely.

Not that it’s going to stop us or Yahoo! Sports. The football-playing Hoosiers are 4-1 after beating Iowa on the road 38-20 last week. Mind you, this is one of the most historically hapless major conference teams in football. Things have gotten so bad in recent years that you may not have even known that IU is 4-1 or that they still play football at all. Hell, Lee Corso was actually our coach at one point!

IU has taken advantage of an extremely easy early-season schedule to get to their current record. Their wins have come over Indiana State, Western Michigan, Akron, and Iowa with the one loss coming at home to Illinois. They don’t play Michigan or Ohio State this season and have a hapless, 1-4 Minnesota team coming to the crib this weekend. They also have the best quarterback/receiver combo in the conference in Kellen Lewis and James Hardy. That’s right, I said it. They’re better than Henne to Manningham partially because Michigan runs the ball too much, and partially because the Hoosiers are forced to throw due to the total absence of a running game. Oh and the Hoosiers didn’t lose to Appalachian State (yeah references to that game aren’t ever going to go away). Still, the point is the Indiana Hoosiers are no longer an easy game for anyone on their schedule. And James Hardy is sick.

Why are we bringing this up, other than because we’re homers? Because the Purdue-controlled media want you to notice. They’re everywhere, just look at Bob Griese with his shifty eyes and terrible quarterback of a son. They let articles like the Yahoo! Sports one show up early in the season so that the Hoosiers will start to feel the pressure to get that sixth win, thus gaining bowl-eligibility for the first time since 1993. In their perfect world, the Hoosiers’ chances at a bowl will come down to the season-ending game against Purdue in Bloomington. Then the Boilermakers will hand the Hoosiers and their fans a painful loss and trot into whatever meaningless bowl they made. This is how Purdue fan thinks, people, they’re that petty. It’s a vast conspiracy and we won’t just sit here and take it. We’re blowing the lid off it right here, right now. Down with the Boiler-led media!

So we rebuke those who would hex our Indiana Hoosiers. This is a great start and the team isn’t going to get stuck thinking about the future yet. It doesn’t matter how many positive articles get written or how good a story the team is since they’re playing this season for Terry Hoeppner, they have Minnesota this weekend and that’s that. Plus, Purdue is totally getting killed by Ohio State this weekend, Troy Smith or no Troy Smith.

God a bowl game would be awesome. I’d totally go. But we’re not thinking about that right now. Nope, not at all.

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  1. 4 Responses to “Indiana University Football: It’s Slightly Improved”

  2. “Went into business for himself”… a great euphemism for drug dealing.

    Thanks for the laugh, and for a solid post. I had no idea the Hoosiers were faring so well… come to think of it, I wasn’t 100% sure they had a football team!

    By Kevin Hayward on Oct 3, 2007

  3. Well, Puck IU too! No wait, that doesn’t work. You’re just jealous of Curtis Painter

    By Cedrick on Oct 4, 2007

  4. hey purdue – no one cares you have the biggest drum.

    By P. Gibbins on Oct 4, 2007

  5. John Kerry and Myles Brand love the Purdue controlled media.

    By BD on Oct 5, 2007

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