Week 13 Top 5: The Super Bowl’s Okay, But We Really Want To Win On Thanksgiving

November 28, 2006 – 9:49 pm by McD

Would some one please explain to us what in the world CBS, Fox, and the NFL network were talking about when they were hyping up their games and saying players could become the greatest Thanksgiving Day players of all time? Since when is Thanksgiving football that big a deal? Last we checked, the NFL gave us three awful games and tried to tell us we were stupid for thinking they were awful. Oh yeah, we’re gonna watch Detroit/Miami because John Kitna might become a great Thanksgiving Day player. Someone call “Mr. May” Dave Winfield.

On to the Top 5 for week 13.

1. Indianapolis Colts (10-1)
Looks like the Colts may have found their running game. Joseph Addai tore up the Eagles on Sunday night, going for 171 yards and 4 touchdowns. We couldn’t be more disappointed. InterSpecies Erotica (McD’s fantasy team) needs the Colts to rely only on Manning so that his passing stats will be artificially inflated. This 14/20 for 183 yards and 1 TD stuff isn’t going to work. The whole point of taking Manning was to cash in on Indy’s biggest flaw.

Still, we’ll see if Addai still runs as well as he did on Sunday when a defense actually gameplans to stop him. It was obvious the Eagles were more worried about the passing game than Joseph Addai. Still, the Colts are 10-1 and that means they’ve gotta be the front runner in the NFL until they mess up in January.

2. San Diego Chargers (9-2)
Never a doubt on Sunday vs the Raiders. Still, the Chargers are gaining some serious momentum and they could/should be scary good by season’s end. On a side note, respect to the Raiders’ defense. That’s a terrible team and they still play well defensively most weeks.

Anyway, LaDainian Tomlinson is, well, what else can we say about him? He’s good. ‘Nuff said. The Bolts have another scrimmage at Buffalo this week. On top of that, they’re healthy/un-suspended as well. Shawne Merriman is back from his steroids suspension and Luis Castillo has recovered from his injury as well. The bad news is that the only reason the Chargers aren’t the new Bengals is because of the actual Bengals. Cornerback Cletis Gordon was arrested this week on suspicion of drunk driving. Another backup corner Markus Curry was released because of his arrest on suspicion of domestic violence. This on the heels of Merriman’s steroid suspension and the Terrence Kiel and Steve Foley “incidents.”

Two-thirds of us are Chargers fans and we say this: we don’t care as long as we win the Super Bowl. And this team just might.

3. Baltimore Ravens (9-2)
Everyone is asking, are the 2006 Ravens better than the 2000 Super Bowl Champion Ravens? The answer is, who cares? The only impressive thing about the Ravens is that they don’t suck on offense anymore. But everyone treats this like some sort of revelation. It’s like Chris Rock said, everybody wants credit for stuff they’re supposed to do. You’re not awful on offense? What do you want, a cookie?

Yes, they did beat the Chargers earlier this year. But this isn’t college football. That doesn’t automatically make them better than the Chargers for all time. Let’s see how the teams play in January when the games matter. This is why the Ravens are behind the Chargers. Since their defenses are very similar in terms of effectiveness and the quarterbacks are essentially a wash too, it comes down to the running backs. Who would you rather have in January? Jamal Lewis’s re-animated corpse or LaDainian Tomlinson? Exactly.

4. Chicago Bears (9-2)
We’ve said it every week, so why stop now? Rex Grossman is terrible. It’s not just that he makes bad plays occasionally. He doesn’t read defenses well, has a penchant for throwing downfield off his back foot (usually into double coverage) and his mechanics are sloppy at best. Sorry Chicago fans, it’s the same problem you’ve had for the last few years. At least you’ve got that Thomas Jones/Cedric Benson two-headed monster to save the team. Ouch.

There’s not much else to say. Another bad loss like last week’s against New England and they probably won’t even be the best team in their own conference. Then again, why are we surprised? This is Chicago. A team that cashed in so much of its sports karma to get the Bulls six titles, that it may never win another major sports championship. Someone had better sacrifice some chickens in that locker room or something because they’re collapsing big time.

5. Dallas Cowboys (7-4)
We’ll leave our analysis of the Cowboys to our intern, Captain Obvious.

The NFL’s hottest team crushed a crappy Tampa Bay team on Turkey Day. In other news, if you haven’t listened to NFL Live, Countdown, Monday Night Countdown, and every sports radio host, this Tony Romo thing is working out alright for Dallas. They beat Indianapolis, which is a nice win for them. But this week’s game against the Giants is their biggest game of the year. The Giants are imploding and all the Cowboys have to do is step on their necks. Hopefully, that happens because we have to admit that NFL football just wouldn’t be as interesting without the Giants’ circus. Also, in case you haven’t noticed over the last 17 years or so, Parcells is a genius.

Honorable Mention: New England Patriots (8-3), Seattle Seahawks (7-4)
There are bad games that teams end up winning and then there are bad games that teams play that they should lose, but the othe team plays worse. The Patriots won one of the latter on Sunday. Also, would some one please get Tom Brady some competent receivers? This should not be a degree-of-difficulty thing for the Pats. Just keep your good players happy and pay them a little more just for being who they are. It’s called taking care of your people. Sheesh, after seeing “The Departed” we thought the mafia up there in Beantown could handle this type of stuff. Don’t the Patriots know anything?

Seattle looked, uh, interesting on Monday night. But more than anything, that game is a harbinger. They’re still in first place in the NFC West despite being outscored by their opponents 243-237. But now they’ve got Shaun Alexander back being Shaun Alexander and this is a quality team when healthy. We kept our toe on the Seahawks’ bandwagon through some rough times, and now we’re climbing all the way back on. Really, it’s the Jessica Alba bandwagon, but you knew that.

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  1. 2 Responses to “Week 13 Top 5: The Super Bowl’s Okay, But We Really Want To Win On Thanksgiving”

  2. not that I am a big chicago sports fan or anything, but your comment about cashing in their sports karma and will never win another sports championship again… Is baseball no longer a major sport? I seem to remember a team from the Chicago area winning some series, maybe even involving the world.

    By Anonymous on Nov 30, 2006

  3. Oh come on, the south side is barely Chicago. Ok, so there was a small oversight there, but the premise is still good. Not ALL Chicago-ans … Chicago-Ites … people from Chicago were happy with the White Sox winning. I think the point was that with the City-wide happiness that came with those Bulls titles, the City has to have the proportional of disappointment with a team eventually. This is all contingent on whether or not you think karma exists … or whether or not there is a God.

    By Phillips on Dec 1, 2006

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